Psalm 46:10 (ESV)
I am trying to wrap up a huge “project” that is due for my master’s in teaching Biology degree as I write this. I didn’t always want to go back to school, but a series of circumstances led me to think it would be a great chance to open up opportunities in the future. But at the moment, I wish I’d never started… well, maybe not exactly, but I’m really struggling. I am a great teacher. I have been observed, offered jobs I didn’t apply for based on my substitute teaching services, told by many people that I do a great job of teaching. But I have to put that into words in a way that someone who’s never seen me teach or interact with students can be assured that I’m a great teacher. This is bringing on such stress and anxiety that I’m not quite sure what to do with myself. I had a zoom call with my professor/advisor in order to “clear up” some questions on the project which left my head spinning in a way that I wasn’t expecting. Once that conversation was finished, I left the classroom where I’ve been working as a student teacher since August (don’t worry… the host teacher has been taking over lately so I could finish my project so I wasn’t abandoning my students). While I had somewhat of a desire to get back into tackling this project again, it dawned on me that what I needed more was fresh air and some time with God. I made my way out the back door into the beautiful sunshine (which has been quite elusive these last few weeks) that I saw as a wonderful blessing from God. We happen to have a decent-sized creek running through the property. I found a quiet, secluded spot to sit and just listen to the rushing water and soak in the sun. I took quite a few deep breaths and began talking to God. I confessed the lies that were running through my head and the fact that I KNEW they weren’t true. I began to remember bible verses that reminded me that I don’t have to be anxious, but I can pray and tell God what I need and want and He will bring me peace (Philippians 4:6-7). I began to tell God my frustrations and fears and what I felt like I needed from Him. I reminded myself that convention might have suggested I get right back to work, but Matthew 6 reminds me that when I seek God first, all these other things will be added.
I didn’t rush the process. I continued to talk, listen, sing, and just give the Holy Spirit time to minister to my soul and bring that promised peace.

I don’t know what is going on in your life that brings you to a place of frustration, desperation, maybe even a sense of hopelessness, but whatever it is… God is bigger. God knows. God sees YOU. And He already has a plan. I pray that you will take time out of your busy day EVEN IF YOU THINK YOU DON’T HAVE TIME. Allow the peace of God to wash over you and know that He will give you exactly what you need to get through this challenge.
As I sit and write this, my project is still looming, and it will still require me to think and work and put forth a lot of effort, BUT I know God is going to guide me and take care of me. I will get it done and He will use this experience to strengthen my character for His glory. And He will do the same for you.

“Answer me when I call, O God of my righteousness! You have given me relief when I was in distress. Be gracious to me and hear my prayer!” Psalm 4:1

One song I sang during this time was inspired by my brother and his kids from last night.. WayMaker by Leeland. The words spoke to my soul as I was reminded that God is the Way Maker and the Miracle Worker and that He is working even when I can’t see it. That is the truth that will guide me through these moments.

Finding Peace When Life is Overwhelming

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