Most everyone, from about their teenage years on, dreams of finding that special someone– especially us girls. We all were created for relationship: “The Lord God said, ‘It is not good that man should be alone…” (Genesis 2:18, ESV). This does NOT necessarily have to refer to a romantic relationship. We were created to be a part of a community; family, friends, spiritual brothers, and sisters. The Bible tells us to not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but to encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near (Hebrews 10:25, NLT). But most everyone will look for a special someone to marry and spend her life with. I am no different. I had dreams of being married by the age of 18 and being a young mom of many children. Seeing as how I am now 44, year 18 was quite a while ago and that season came and went without a lasting romantic relationship.

Life was still fun and adventurous. I went to college and found my vocational calling as a teacher. I cheered on my students as they thrived and grew through sports, arts, photography, and a myriad of other activities. I made amazing, lifelong friends and traveled the world. I am a super thankful and cool Aunt and have a wonderful relationship with friends and family. There have been countless blessings along the way. But there were also days and seasons of loneliness, frustration, and questioning.

In one of my life groups at church, we read a book entitled “Choosing God’s Best”. I took away 2 main tidbits of wisdom from that study. 1-Live life- take trips, do fun things, eat on the “good china”. Don’t wait to do fun things until you have that “special someone”. 2- Focus on BEING the right person, not FINDING the right person. What are things God is working on in you right now that you need to address? If you can’t be happy, healthy, and whole as a single person, you won’t find that completion once you get married. In fact, the unmet expectations that your future spouse will “complete you” are fictional and will put too much strain on your marriage.

I also really appreciated and learned from Ben Stuart’s book “Single, Dating, Engaged, Married” along with the accompanying sermon series. There are so many parameters and practical pieces of advice that can support you no matter which stage you are in.

You might be wondering where I currently am on this journey… I’m glad you asked. On September 18, 2021, I was blessed with the opportunity to marry my best friend, the love of my life, someone who is just about a perfect match for me. God blessed our broken roads and allowed us to meet and develop a deep, intimate, emotional connection that will be a great foundation for the rest of our lives here on earth. God allowed us to honor him with our sexual relationship and wait to celebrate in that way on our wedding night. I was a virgin, and while he had been married before, the fact that we saved this sacred act for that special night was more special than I could ever express in words. I had absolutely no regrets that we made that choice.

Nothing on this earth is flawlessly perfect, but when you freely allow God to be the Lord of your life, He brings about blessings and favor that will blow your mind. I could fill a million pages with testimony to God’s love, faithfulness, gentleness, wisdom, and power. But I pray that you either begin or continue your own God story. Trust him with the timing and details of your dreams. Even be prepared for God to change some of your dreams. He is 100% trustworthy and really does have the best life waiting for you. And let me be your biggest cheerleader on your journey by reminding you that it is #worththewait.

Don’t birth Ishmael because you can’t wait for Isaac. (See Genesis 15-16)

“Choosing God’s Best” by Dr. Don Raunikar

Single, Dating, Engaged, Married” by Ben Stuart


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